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Compassion for self and others

Updated: Jan 13, 2022


The English word compassion means “suffering with”. In Buddhist practice, compassion is not just sympathy, pity, or empathy. It always begins with one of these responses to our own and others’ suffering. And what follows is our wish for others to be free from suffering and our desire and our intent to think and act in ways that can alleviate our own and others’ pain.


This is not easy because the arising of compassion can naturally lead to being sad oneself. It may also provoke anger and a desire to punish others who have caused the suffering (the opposite of compassion, and known in Buddhism as the far enemy). We may be angry about the injustices in the world when we feel for those who have been treated cruelly.


There is nothing wrong with this. But to cultivate compassion we need to put aside our anger and open our heart to others’ pain and suffering. We can then move to the positive mental condition of being filled with the wish for others to be free from affliction and suffering.

In Buddhist teaching, compassion (karuna) is one of the four divine abodes known as the Brahmaviharas. The most well-known is loving-kindness (metta). It is sometimes considered helpful in training in these positive states to begin by cultivating loving-kindness and then to train in contemplating compassion and adopting a compassionate attitude towards ourselves and others.


The cultivation of these mind states and attitudes to ourselves and others is said to be an antidote to the three “poisons” – greed, hatred and delusion. For example, when we feel self-critical and judgmental, compassion towards ourselves as suffering beings can soften and weaken these negative states.


We can train in compassion as an addition to our regular meditation. Many Buddhist practitioners are familiar with practising loving-kindness, and the cultivation of compassion is practised in the same way. To start, we gently direct compassion to ourselves. Then we can follow this by directing compassion to those close to us and then to all sentient beings.


The cultivation of compassion helps us counter fear, cruelty and ignorance.

A kind, caring and compassionate attitude towards others in these difficult times is so important for the wellbeing and health of us all. May all beings be free from suffering


Compassionate body scan

A guided meditation by Kristen Neff

This 20-minute guided meditation can help deepen your sense of self-compassion and body awareness.Extract from an E-book

Extract from Compassion and the individual

by His Holiness the Dalai Lama

"... From my own limited experience I have found that the greatest degree of inner tranquillity comes from the development of love and compassion.

The more we care for the happiness of others, the greater our own sense of well-being becomes. Cultivating a close, warmhearted feeling for others automatically puts the mind at ease. This helps remove whatever fears or insecurities we may have and gives us the strength to cope with any obstacles we encounter. It is the ultimate source of success in life.


As long as we live in this world we are bound to encounter problems. If, at such times, we lose hope and become discouraged, we diminish our ability to face difficulties. If, on the other hand, we remember that it is not just ourselves but everyone who has to undergo suffering, this more realistic perspective will increase our determination and capacity to overcome troubles. Indeed, with this attitude, each new obstacle can be seen as yet another valuable opportunity to improve our mind!

Thus we can strive gradually to become more compassionate, that is we can develop both genuine sympathy for others' suffering and the will to help remove their pain. As a result, our own serenity and inner strength will increase." Read the full article

Patricia Austin teaches meditation at the Buddhist Library. She previously worked as a clinical psychologist and is now retired. Here she offers some thoughts on compassion.





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